School lunch survey

This month, the Board of Trustees appointed a group of parents, students and staff to serve on the school lunch committee. The committee met last evening. Members include: Kim Monk, Kelly Porter, Becky Kopf, Nancy Becker, Sherrie Tilleman, Becky Pickard, Sammy Sperber, Tauna Tyler, Jan Hasfurther, and me.

The goals of the committee are to:

1. develop a parent and student survey to determine attitudes regarding the lunch program.
   
2. Analyze the results of the questionnaires.
3. Make recommendations to the Board of Trustees in July for possible implementation.

The surveys will be sent home with elementary students on Friday. Secondary parent surveys will be mailed home today. The survey has also been posted on our web site on the home page. Your feedback is very important to the success of this endeavor. Please take a few minutes to complete the survey and return it to school by Monday.

The students will take a few minutes next week to complete their surveys in class. Results of all surveys will be available on our web site and will be presented to the Board in July.

The genesis for this committee came from the increasing financial deficit the school food service program generates which has a direct impact on the funds available for academic instruction. Next fiscal year the district will transfer $34,000 to the food service program to eliminate the deficit. Ironically, $34,000 is the amount a beginning teacher earns! Previous studies, using food service consultants and Idaho Department of Education Nutrition Program program managers, have been conducted.

The cost per plate has been analyzed, menus have been scrutinized, labor has been reduced, breakfast has been dropped, portion control has been emphasized, lunch room atmosphere has been improved, entree options for secondary students have been offered and other steps have been taken to control costs. It is obvious that the only way the program can break even is with increased participation. Currently we hover around 50% participation. We need at least 70% to have a chance to break even.

Please complete the survey and return it promptly to school to help the committee formulate suggestions for Board consideration which may increase participation. Thank you for your help.

Preparation by 8th Grade Critical to College & Career Readiness

According to a recent study by ACT, The Forgotten Middle, students who are not on track for college and career readiness by eighth grade are unlikely to attain that level of readiness by high school graduation.

Essentially, the academic achievement that students reach by the eighth grade has a larger impact on future success in college or a career than any other single factor. This includes high school courses taken, grades in high school and even socio-economic factors such as gender, household income or race.

The report indicates significant implications for the our economy. "The skills necessary for entry into the majority of the fastest-growing jobs that require a high school diploma and offer a livable wage are comparable to those needed for success in first-year college courses." The President of ACT Education Division, Cynthia Schmeiser, noted that high school-level interventions which could include taking more rigorous courses, studying harder and earning higher grades in high school would certainly help but the fact remains that eighth grade students will have a very difficult time making up the lost ground.

Many middle level students have not developed adequate academic skills and attitudes that foster this readiness. In other words, junior high classes matter! It is that simple. Students cannot wait until high school to begin school in earnest, they need to have continual achievement from early elementary through their high school careers.

The report makes the following recommendations:

• Focus K-8 standards on the knowledge and skills that are essential for college and career readiness and make these non-negotiable for students.
• Monitor student progress toward college and career readiness beginning in upper elementary school and continuing through middle school and intervene with students who are not on target.
• Improve students' academic behaviors (homework compliance, attendance, and other aspects of academic discipline).
• Increase federal and state support for intervention programs that help all students become ready for college and career.

Bike Month

May is National Bike Month and May 11-15 is Bike-to-Work week. We would like to encourage students to ride to school this month. Bicycle racks are located on the east side of the playground and students can lock their bikes to the rack, if desired.

If your student would like to ride to school or currently does ride to school, the two most important precautions you can encourage your student to take are:

• Always... always wear an approved bike helmet and always wear it correctly.
• Always wear light colored or bright clothing so it is easy for motorists to see the bicyclist

As our culture has evolved with more and more electronic games and entertainment devices, young people are not getting adequate exercise. This is a serious problem locally, statewide and nationally. We are seeing a frightening increase of obesity in children attending school. Walking or biking daily, in addition to physical education and active recess goes a long way towards helping your student remain healthy and fit.

Believe it or not, Idaho is nationally recognized for their bicycle laws. Idaho is the only state where a bicyclist is not required to come to a complete stop at a stop sign or stop light. That does not mean a bicyclist can blow through an intersection. It means the rider should slow down and make sure it is clear before entering the intersection. Not having to come to a complete stop allows those riders who are clipped into their pedals to continue without taking their feet off the pedals.

Otherwise, bicyclists should follow normal driving rules including signaling turns. A bicyclist has the same right-of-way as a motorist even if the rider is traveling at a slower speed. Again, this is not to say riders should ride down the middle of the street oblivious to motorists, but motorists have an obligation to pass riders with care. All motorists should pay particular attention when passing young children as they often weave back and forth and they may not know the motorist is behind them.

Encourage your student to ride to school during National Bike Week (May 11-15) and encourage them to walk, run, bike, play sports... get outside as much as possible. But remember... if your child rides to school make sure they have their properly fitting helmet on.

Swine Flu

The news seems dominated by swine flu these days. The Genesee School District receives regular updates from the Idaho North Central Public Health District and the Center for Disease Control. There have been no confirmed cases of swine flu in Idaho although four individuals have had flu-like illnesses that are being tested. During the past five years we have been studying and planning for a potential pandemic flu. At this point, we do not know if this will become widespread.

The best thing parents can tell their children and the advice we always give to students is to follow good respiratory etiquette. This includes:

• Wash your hands after being in public, or after coughing or sneezing. Avoid touching your eyes, nose or mouth;
• Cover your cough or sneeze, or cough into your elbow;
• If you are sick, stay home from work or school. Protect your co-workers and friends. Please don't travel when you are sick; and
• Avoid close contact with people who are sick.

Symptoms of swine flu are similar to seasonal flu and include fever, cough, sore throat, body aches, headache, chills and fatigue. Some people have reported diarrhea and vomiting. People cannot contract the infection from eating properly cooked pork.

The CDC will soon be shipping medications and supplies to states in case the outbreak becomes more serious. Right now the best thing we can all do is to observe the bulleted points above.

Parent-Teacher Organization

An organizational meeting to re-form the Genesee PTO will be held on Wednesday, May 6 at 7:00 PM in the mutli-purpose room. This will be an informal and informational meeting. All parents and teachers are invited.

A number of years ago, Genesee had a very active PTO group but, for various reasons, it dissolved. Tami Pope and Caty Spence recently visited with me to see about reactivating the PTO. I think it is a wonderful idea that deserve parent and community support.

Parent-Teacher Organizations can serve several useful purposes for students, parents and teachers. There are always positive ways to get involved with your school. PTO groups hold fundraisers that provide quality activities for students like carnivals and contests. They can be effective advocates for school program support. And they can offer volunteer help and moral support for teachers.

Come to the meeting and help design the goals and objectives of the Genesee PTO. You'll be glad you did.

Historical Pupil/Teacher Ratio Data

There has been significant discussion in the School District regarding the possibility that there may be a reduction in the number of teachers due to declining enrollment. One of the best measures we can look at, over time, is pupil-teacher ratio. The Idaho Department of Education has published this historical data on their web site.

I have posted a chart showing our District's pupil-teacher ratio from the 1993-94 school year until the current school year. As you can see on the chart there have been three years (06-07, 04-05 and 98-99) where we had a slightly smaller ratio than we do this year. Of course, this is a function of enrollment and staffing. The statewide teacher-pupil ratio is 18.2. One of the benefits of a small school is a lower pupil-teacher ratio. The lower the ratio, the higher the cost.

The trend line on the chart shows that, over time, our teacher-pupil ratio has declined. Within reason this is a good thing, but as enrollment continues to decline it is reasonable to consider what ratio is desirable for the District? What ratio demonstrates prudent management of financial resources? How can we best staff the school district to carry out our mission over time? These are all questions the Board of Trustees and the Administration must consider as we adjust to the current economic and demographic reality.

Based on our fall enrollment projections of 279 students (K-12) and 23.9 FTE teachers (assuming the Board accepts my staffing recommendation) our pupil-teacher ratio will decline to 11.7; the lowest level since the Department of Education began reporting this data.

Ideas for raising children

Two important principles for interacting with your children are: (1) Know and follow the values you want your children to live with, and (2) understand them from their point of view. Parents should list the main values and principles for living that they want their children to master. What specific positive traits do you want your children to have. Make a list for each child.

A confident parent who creates a loving relation with his children, will find that his children will listen to him. When telling your children to do or not to do something, your voice needs to show confidence that you expect your children to listen to what you have to say. If you sound as if you don't really expect your children to listen to you, they will pick up your non-verbal message and are very likely not going to listen.

Be clear and specific when telling your children what they should or should not do. Telling a child to "be good" is too vague and not likely to be very effective. When you see things from your child's point of view, you will be careful to respect his feelings and thoughts. This will give your children a sense of self-respect and respect for others. Think about how you wanted to be treated when you were a child. Taking individual differences into account, act that way towards your children. Keep in mind that no child wants to be insulted or ridiculed by their parents.

Don't threaten your children. When you threaten a child, you create unnecessary anxiety and fear. If you make threats that you both know you won't keep, you are teaching them not to take you seriously. Threats automatically imply that you think there is a possibility that your children will not listen to you. Never give your children negative labels. negative labels create negative self-image, which is highly destructive.

Don't expect perfection when interacting with your children. Everyone makes mistakes. If you feel you have made mistakes in the past, begin again now. Be totally committed to creating a loving relationship with each of your children. Apologize to your children when it is appropriate. Apologizing is not a sign of weakness.

Don't fulfill your child's every request. Deny your children something at least once a day. Life is tough. You want to train your child to deal with difficulties and disappointments - not to expect that every whim and desire will be fulfilled. Unfulfilled expectations are the source of most misery. "Cornucopia kids" will never learn to grow up as happy adults.

Average Daily Attendance

In Idaho, schools are funded primarily based on ADA or average daily attendance versus the alternative method which would be based on enrollment. Enrollment seems to make sense since the school must supply teachers, textbooks, desks, rooms, supplies, etc. for every student who walks through the doors without regard for the student's individual attendance pattern. But that is not the way our funding system works in this state.

The implication for schools is that it financially benefits the school district to have as high an attendance rate as possible. Genesee has historically had a ninety-five percent attendance rate but we have seen some erosion of that recently. Certainly when a student is ill that student should remain at home so he or she gets better quickly and does not spread germs at school, but otherwise we would hope to see the student as much as possible. There is a financial reason which I will discuss below, but we also know that students who attend school on a regular basis perform better academically. I have seen many research studies which suggest that increasing time on task increases student achievement. I am still waiting to see even one study which suggests spending less time learning improves student achievement.

Regular attendance helps students develop positive habits which better prepare them for success in the work force. I have had numerous employers over the years inquire about students who have applied for employment. These employers seldom ask about the students' grades but they often ask about their attendance patterns, behavior, self-discipline, etc. These are all part of a thorough public education.

Financially, attendance can have a huge impact on the funding any district receives from the State. We currently have 290 students who average nearly a 95% attendance rate. This year we budgeted $2,035,644 in state funds. Assuming that is the amount we receive (we won't know until the year is over and our best 28 weeks of attendance is calculated) we have given up $107,132 in lost state funding as a result. In other words had all of our students had perfect attendance we would have received $369.42 more per student or $107,132! That works out to about $41 per day for every day of absence.

Who cares you might ask? Everyone with a stake in the School District should care. Based on the information we have today, if everything held equal next year and we had perfect attendance we would not have to make any significant cuts to programs or increase the levy. That is significant for parents, patrons and students.

Can anything be done? For the District's part we can analyze our school calendar and not hold school on days when traditionally a large number of students are gone such as during the fair or Thanksgiving week, etc. This may sound easy but every calendar committee we put together always wants to begin after labor day, have a week at Thanksgiving, two weeks for winter break, a week for spring break and get out before Memorial Day. There simply are not enough days to do that without attending on Saturdays.

Parents can attempt to schedule appointments and family vacations on days when school is not in session or on days of early release. I realize this is not always possible, but it would be helpful. Any individual action that can be taken to improve average daily attendance will have a significant positive impact on our students.

Lunch Program... use it or lose it.

On March 19th I wrote about our child nutrition program (commonly called hot lunch). I explained how we are reimbursed at varying rates for lunches depending on the status of the student eating the lunch. I discussed the current cost per meal and some of the steps we have taken as a school district to reduce costs. I explained that we stand to lose $30,000 this year. I indicated that "the only way we will ever break even is to increase the participation rate to between 70-80% of all students." At the end of March only 47.8% of the first through twelfth grade students are eating on any given day.

Many patrons have expressed support for the continuance of the child nutrition program. Last evening at the Board meeting, several parents expressed the possibility of surveying parents and students to find out what we might do to encourage a higher percentage of student participation. At the suggestion of a trustee, we will reconvene our wellness committee and develop survey questions that we will make available online.

You can help us design a questionnaire that will provide us with valuable information.Would questions such as the following help you to provide us valuable information? Can you think of others?

• What do you like and not like about the program?
• What does your student like and not like?
• Are the meals appetizing in appearance?
• Are the meals a good value?
• Does the food taste good?
• Is it simply too expensive?
• Do we need greater variety?
• Should we close the campus to high school students and force them to remain on campus?
• Should we invite the general public to eat in our cafeteria when the students are present?
• Should elementary students have a choice of entree also?

Perhaps there is nothing we could do to encourage you or your student to utilize our lunch program. We would like to hear from you about that also.

The trustees would prefer to continue to operate the child nutrition program but it is becoming increasingly difficult as our enrollment declines and costs increase. It may come down to using it or losing it.

Please provide a comment to this post or send comments directly to Superintendent Neumann at dneumann@sd282.org. Thank you for your help.

Driving at noon

The School Board has a policy whereby students are not allowed to drive during the lunch hour unless they have permission from the Principal (in an extraordinary situation) or they are leaving school grounds for work experience. Those students who do have permission to drive at lunch may not give a ride to another student.

Over the years numerous parents and students have questioned why the Trustees have such a rule and have, on several occasions, asked the Board to change the policy. The Board has never chosen to change the rule. Our high school is an open campus at lunch which means that students may walk home or downtown for lunch. They may not drive at lunch because the Board is concerned with the health and safety of students. Another concern of the Board of Trustees is the potential liability to the taxpayers should a student be injured while driving at lunch.

Students know the rules. Those who choose to ignore the rule and get caught are generally given detention the first time. Subsequent violations can lead to suspension. While the Principal supervises the parking lot as best she can, we are always happy to have a concerned patron call the Principal (285-1162 extension 203), identify him or herself and the students involved.

The importance of a high school diploma

According to a report just issued by the Center for Public Education, "school districts should make every effort to help students receive a high school diploma even if it takes longer than four years."

According to the report, late graduates who receive their diploma in more than four years were compared to three other groups: on-time graduates, students who earn a GED and dropouts. As expected on-time graduates had the best outcomes in every aspect of life - not just academic, but work, civic life and even health - but late graduates were a close second ahead of GED and dropouts.

Eight-five percent of late graduates were employed compared to 77% of those who received GEDs and 81% of the dropouts. Late grads were also more likely to be employed full-time and possess a job with full benefits.

The report recommends schools offer a curriculum that adequately prepares middle level students for high school courses, identify struggling students and provide intervention programs as well as providing additional support for low-achieving students in high school.

Fortunately, our middle level students are taught by the same teachers who instruct high school students and these teachers are able to provide a sequential progression which helps students build the skills and abilities needed in high school courses while they are middle level students. This year the District implemented a policy whereby junior high or middle level courses are transcripted and students who do not make adequate progress in the 7th and 8th grade do not automatically move on to the next higher grade. It is certainly important that middle level students be prepared, but we feel it is even more important that elementary students are prepared adequately in the fundamental skills which lead to success in school. Our belief in early success led us to become one of the early school districts in Idaho to adopt the Response to Intervention model.

Genesee School has used the Response to Intervention (RtI) model to provide needed support for struggling students at any grade level. RtI has had a major impact on our school by using a data-based decision-making process. Rather than assume the student has a problem, RtI requires that we look at the instruction, the curriculum and the environment in addition to the student. Parents play an integral part in the decision-making process and students are closely monitored during the intervention to insure it is working as anticipated. We believe that the changes we have adopted as we have implemented RtI have had a major impact on student achievement in our school.

Due to our small size, it is difficult for students to "fall between the cracks" and we have few dropouts. I believe a student has to work harder to fail than to succeed in Genesee. Our teachers go the extra mile to help students by coming in early or staying after school, as needed. This is not to say that the student is not ultimately responsible for his or her own education, but that support is available for those who seek it out.

The Quality School

William Glasser, M.D. made the case in his seminal work The Quality School that one of the major reasons why so few students are involved in high-quality honors or advanced-placement classes is that schools historically use boss management. Students, just like teachers and other adults, have a quality world where they place things that are important to them. A student may place a specific teacher or subject in his quality world. Once this occurs, he will be intrinsically motivated to excel in that subject or for that teacher. This is what Glasser calls Control Theory.

No human is unmotivated. Boss-teachers and administrators might lament that students are not motivated but what they are really saying is that they do not know how to persuade students to work. And as long as they believe in coercion, they never will. It is always what we want at the time the causes our behavior. If keeping quiet is in the student's best interest, he will do so.

Managers can count on coercion to achieve only the simplest tasks. The same goes for reward. It isn't the reward that motivates; it is the individuals perception of how much he wants the reward that determines his behavior. What happens to us from outside has a lot to do with what we choose to do, but the outside event does not cause our behavior.

Lead-managers and lead-teachers prefer to give the workers or students the kind of information that will persuade them to do as they are directed because it is as much or more to their benefit as it is to the teacher's. Students will do things for a teacher they like and care about that they would never do for a teacher they do not care about.

Why are some students so motivated in their extra-curricular (sports, music, drama, etc.) activities? Students will tell you they feel important in these activities. Ask them and they will tell you that in these situations where they work together as a group or on a team, they work harder and accomplish more because they help each other and have more fun. This same type of work ethic can occur in academic classes as well, when students are actively engaged in their learning in a supportive and enjoyable environment.

It is not always easy to conduct school business in this fashion. Sometimes we do not have enough time or outside interests or pressure dictate what we must do, but the more we can help each student to place school into his quality world, the more effective we will be and the more the student will derive from his education.

Cyber Bullying

Bullying has unfortunately always been a reality for some school children. Bullies have always existed and school personnel are always on the lookout to prevent bullying. Now bullies have a new way to prey on their victims - cyber bullying. Cyber bullying is using technology to threaten, insult, or harass. Cell phones and the Internet allow for aggressive expression toward others that doesn't rely on physical strength or even physical contact. Students who cyber bully can quickly and aggressively spread rumors, threats, hate mail, or embarrassing photos through text messages, emails and instant messages.

It is all too easy for bullies to remain anonymous. It is much easier for those who cyber bully to harass when they are able to hide their identities with false screen names or temporary email addresses. A recent study found that 42% of the student respondents had been bullies online, and one in four more than once. 35% indicated they had been threatened online with nearly one in five having been threatened more than once. 53% admit to having said something mean or hurtful to another person online. These statistics point to the insidious misuse of these technologies.

The Genesee School District passed Policy 310.17 - electronic communication devices to provide an avenue to deal with misuse of cell phones and other electronic communication devices. Existing policies regarding harassment and bullying have been in place for some time. The District has no tolerance for bullying of any kind. Students, or parents of students, who feel they have been subject to bullying or harassment at school should contact the Principal and complete the Harassment Reporting Form available on our web site.

Parents can help their children to use new technologies appropriately by talking about Internet safety:

• not giving out personal information
  
• not responding to suggestive, threatening and belligerent messages, and
  
• not clicking on links in email from people they do not know

Also explain cyber bullying and what your child can do to prevent it. Consider including the following:

• do not respond to or forward emails and messages that are mean or spread rumors
• don't open emails or messages from someone they know bullies others
• block messages from anyone who cyber bullies
• save or print all bullying messages
• show the messages to an adult they trust - like a parent or teacher - and ask for help
• never arrange to meet someone who bullies them online

The District response to all cyber bullying is:

• teach lessons to educate students about cyber bullying
• respond quickly and sensitively to cyber bullying reports
• take seriously families' concerns about cyber bullying
• look into all report cyber bullying incidents
  

Recess and test scores

A recent study published by the journal Pediatrics showed that children who took a recess of more than 15 minutes per day had better classroom behavior than those who did not. The study looked at 11,000 children ages 8 and 9 and found this daily break from structured learning was just as essential to a child's education as the math, science and reading lessons they received in the classroom.

This is an important study which comes at a time when many schools across the country have eliminated recess or cut physical education so that there would be more time to teach all the reading, writing and arithmetic needed to pass standardized tests. Fortunately, most experts will agree that recess is an integral part of maintaining focus in the classroom.

In the elementary grades, our students have morning and afternoon recess plus an additional recess after lunch. GSD Policy 310.15 - Physical Activity and Physical Education specifically states that all grade 1-6 students will be offered 40-60 minutes a day of supervised recess, preferably outdoors, during which the school should encourage moderate to vigorous physical activity.

According to the Pediatrics study, 30 percent of the group studied was not being given any type of recess throughout the day, which has become more common. In some districts, physical education and recess hours have been downsized to meet increased pressure to raise students' scores on standardized testing.

There is some evidence to suggest that physical activity can have a positive impact on standardized assessment results. There is no question we need to improve student achievement but we need to be careful to look at the whole child when making decisions about the efficient use of time at school.

"The future belongs to the nation who educates their children"

"The future belongs to the nation who educates their children." This quote from President Obama's speech earlier this week carries significant implications for the United States and the current state of our economy. The current economic crisis has touched nearly everyone in the country and has caused business and government alike to react to diminishing revenue streams. We may long for the "good old days" but, as many economists have suggested, the "good old days" may not have been as good as we think they were and they may not return.

But one thing is for sure. High quality education increases economic wealth through improved productivity. The challenge now is not to attempt to maintain the status-quo but to continue to move forward and provide an even more effective and robust education system even as revenue streams diminish. We need to identify the core of instruction. What skills and knowledge must our graduates possess in the 21st century to successfully compete with peers in India, Japan, China and Germany? How do we restructure education to accomplish this herculean task? How do we prepare students for a world with accelerating rates of change? The risks of not meeting this challenge are enormous for each student and for our state and country.

None of this is easy to accomplish. Fortunately, both public and private institutions have produced volumes of quality, replicable research to help point the way. Sometimes the research contradicts commonly held beliefs developed over time. After all, we all spent many years in school and we know "how it is done." If we are preparing students to work in factories we should utilize a factory model of education; bells, straight rows, similarity of tasks, movement from one unrelated task to another, student workers and boss teachers, etc. But, if we are in a post-industrial age then our education system needs to reflect this change. We need to insure that coming to school is not like visiting a history museum. While I would love to think that educational professionals are so powerful that we can change society, in fact, schools reflect society.

Schools also reflect their community. A community that demands and expects a vibrant, high-quality education system that changes to meet the needs of our students will produce successful graduates. Schools living with success made yesterday will graduate students who will find some career paths closed to them because of a lack of preparation. We are fortunate to live and work in Genesee, an education-minded community that has supported hiring the best staff, providing facilities that are safe and conducive to learning, and electing school trustees who put kids before personal agendas.

As we continue to restructure to meet future challenges your input and help will be needed. Thank you for your support of education.

A Lesson in Self Esteem

I would like to relate a powerful story I read the other day regarding teaching our kids who they really are and what makes them special. I will paraphrase this story to shorten it up a bit:

Zack is a 12 year old 7th grade middle school student. At his school there is a clique of 'popular' kids who have begun having parties. Zack, though he is kind, funny, intelligent and warm, has always had a hard time making many friends because of his shyness in social situations. It's hard for him to be social and he's not invited to most parties. Most of the kids hand out tee shirts or sweatshirts as favors at their parties. The Monday following the party, all of the kids who were at the party come to school wearing their new shirts. Zack often comes home many Mondays feeling sad.

Last Saturday, Zack attended a party of a boy whose father does business with Zack's dad which is why he was invited since the boy doesn't really ever talk to Zack. When Monday morning came around, Zack's parents told Zack he wasn't allowed to wear the sweatshirt he had received at the party to school because Zack's parents felt it was important to teach Zack a lesson about compassion. His parents told him that just as his feelings were hurt on many Mondays, other children will be hurting now. And it's also like bragging that Zack went to a popular boy's party. Zack listened but wasn't happy. When Zack came home he said that all the kids who were wearing their sweatshirts made the others feel bad anyway so why couldn't he wear his? Zack's mother told him that regardless of what others did he knew he didn't cause others pain.

Zack's mother felt like this was a character-building experience that he will understand one day but she was unsure. A friend suggested she sit down with Zack and let him know how proud she was of the way he respected the parent's decision, even though it was difficult for him to carry through. Too often we criticize our children but neglect to tell them how proud we are of them. She went on to suggest that the mother explain to Zack that when he feels hurt by others in life, he should always try to remember that feeling so that he never inflicts pain on anyone else. It would be so much easier, of course, to just forget about the other kids who are feeling sad and leave them behind. But then what? You are acting the same way as those who hurt you. The point of going through something is not to grow insensitive, but, rather to grow from the experience and become a kinder, more compassionate human being. That way, you know in your heart of hearts that you have taken the higher road, and that is the greatest road to take in life.

But here is the greatest lesson of all. Ask Zack if these kids are being nice to him and including him only when he wears the "in" sweatshirt, what kind of friends are these? What happens next week, when he's back Monday morning without the right shirt on? Are they back to not including him because he wasn't at the big weekend party? If someone is your friend only for the label on your shirt, is that called a true friend? And then, if you lose the label, do you lose your friends? Do you lose your sense of self? Are you only as good as the shirt on your back? Ask yourself Zack, without this shirt, who am I?